The Missus and I got into an argument once over Billy Joel's "We Didn't Start the Fire" when she praised it for being so creative. I countered with the notion that it's not creative at all, it's just listing things that happened in the 20th century in no particular order and occasionally rhyming. It has no consistency, no timeline, no over-arching narrative, no commentary on what's happening (other than the insightful "wow! isn't the world a crazy place where stuff always happens?"), nothing...it's just a meaningless recitation of major events and completely inconsequential events he threw in for reasons of cadence and rhyme.
And even then, the lyrics are fucking ridiculous. Listen to the song and really pay attention to it -- half the things he mentions are just people's names he throws out, and half of those people really don't warrant it. For instance, Bob Dole?!? What exactly was Bob Dole's impact on the fire of the world (which keeps on turning)? Being a forgettable Senator and handily losing a presidential election?
And what finally pushes Mr. Joel over the cliff at the end of the song? Nuclear paranoia? Mid-east turmoil? The savings and loan crisis?
Nope. The cola wars. Pepsi vs. Coke.
Do what you will to the world, says Billy Joel, but don't pit two innocent sodas against each other like that. How can we collectively live with ourselves after the billions of dollars in property damage and thousands of lives lost in that meaningless war?
For further proof, check out this great article detailing why Billy Joel sucks so much more than other similarly shitty pop musicians.