Friday, May 07, 2010

Hello, Would You Like To Give Me Several Thousand Dollars?

So I have this really ambitious dissertation plan. And it's a good plan. Like a really, really good plan. Everything is all set -- I know who I want to talk to, I know what I want to find out, and I know how I'm going to do it all.

The only snag is that I need lots of money to accomplish it. Say, somewhere in the range of 10-20 thousand dollars.

I do not have 10-20 thousand dollars.

So I've been applying to all of these places for money. And it's not like these are easy applications. No one accepts "I'm smart! Trust me!" as reason enough to give someone 5 figures. No, they want lots and lots of details. So you spend like a month and half working on each of these applications.

And then they reject you. And then you are sad. In this case, by "you" I mean "me." I am the one who is rejected and sad.

I have one more organization I'm waiting to hear from. After they reject me I will officially be a guy with a really good plan and nothing else. But at least when I'm a penniless bum turning tricks on the corner to get another bottle of booze to wash away the painful memories of when I thought I was going to do something with my life I'll have a really good plan I can tell people about.



keesa said...

you are brilliant, it is a great plan, and I love you.

Anonymous said...

have you applied to anything at the open society institute? most of their grants are for international people (non-US) but they do have fellowships and grants for Am-er-ic-uhns too.