Monday, May 07, 2007
Illustration provided by the Father of Frances
On the bottom of my paper grocery bag, it has a stamp of approval from the "Paper Bag Council."
This is beyond my ability to make a joke.
A group of wealthy business associates get together once a month in high-powered meetings to decide the agenda of the paper fucking bag council.
What are they deciding in there?
Chairman: "Well, gentlemen, as you can see from the numbers, paper is once again king for the proper carrying of light items!"
rest of council: "paper! paper! paperpaperpaperpaper!"
Chairman: "But gentlemen, it must finally be decided: handles or no handles?"
half of council: "handles! handles for e'er! handles or DEATH!"
other half of council: "Nay! Handles be the plaything o' the devil!"
And that is the story of the great Paper Bag Council Split of 1782. It was exactly 200 years later that the council was finally re-convened under the gentle but stern guidance of John Papercouncil the IVth.
Posted by Woz at 9:48 PM