I've never dated anyone who was computer saavy enough to do anything beyond e-mail, and most of my former girlfriends hold me in low- to mid-esteem at best, so I figure it's pretty safe to kvetch about my women problems here.
[unecissarily long side-bar: A few years ago, I found out that I'm Jewish. Not by choise (I'm a practicing Catholic), but by birth. Not that I have anything against Jews. In fact, I have a great respect for them. Anyway, with the aide of a good buddy of mine who not only converted to Orthadox Judaism (the hardcore shit) but is also becoming a Rabbi while in Yeshiva in Israel, I've come to know much more about my Jewish heritage. As a result, I've discovered that I actually use a large amount of Yiddish, picked up from my very Jewish mother and Grandmother (even though they were both Catholics as well...it's a heritage thing, not a religion thing). Anyway, I've found that most Johnny and Susy Gentiles don't know Yiddish, and hence, are very confused by my vocabulary. So, from now on, in order to educate the populace and perform a feat of service (or a Mitzvah, if you will) I will provide a link that defines all of my Yiddish words, so that you can use them and be JewCool© as well.]
So I was once engaged...kinda. I mean, the girl I was with asked me to marry her, and I was all for it, but we both recognized it would be best to wait for her very wealthy, very WASP, very conservative parents to get used to this little commie Jew, or Kikemunist as I've been called. But we eventually parted ways, with her citing the fact that I spent too much time at work (which one could call laughable, since I typically put in a 30 hour week max, and even then, that's pretty rare) and we have had very little contact since then, due to her...uh...interesting behavoir. And in this case "interesting" means "whore-like." We had decided it was best to not see each other, but on her insistence, we agreed to get together for dinner one last time to say good-bye before I head off and never see her again. Well, I found through a friend that she'll be out of town starting this weekend, and gone until I'm gone, never to come back. So I call her up today and ask her if she wants me to honor that promise and have one last good-bye dinner with her.
"Sorry, I'm too busy with work."
And yes, I'm quite sure she misses the irony of this. But what is the point of all of this? The point is that this made me upset for some reason. Since she and I parted ways, it's been one of those classic tales where I've found out much about her that has made me see her in a much different light. She was much the Jane Fonda to my Tom Hayden. Ask your parents if you don't get the refference, but what I'm getting that is any similarity we had, it turns out she was just faking because she was a lost kid looking for someone to accept her. So I really shouldn't be upset about her flaking out, right? But I am. And I've made this horrible realization:
Everything I do in life is either geared to the acquisition of female company, or keeping said company once it has been acquired.
Great example: Today I was grocery shopping and I sneezed. A Cute Girl I don't know said "Bless you" and it practically made my day. It's a hard realization to face the fact that you're that pathetic.
The point of all of this?
Well, there really isn't a point, only that I'm depressed about the fact that I live a rather sad existance based on desperately hoping women will like me. So I implore you all to find a hobby, or read a book, or something, just so you can say you're doing something just for yourself, not in the vain hope of attracting a mate.
Sorry about the rambling personal post. The next post will totally be about toppling those fucking capitalist fascist pigs, or some such similar thing.